and for those of you who eat out regularly---

Here's a tip: 20% is the new 15%

The standard has increased, making it simpler to figure out how much to add to your check. But the culture of tipping is as complex as ever.


I used to feel generous because I tipped 20% in restaurants. It was a shout-out, I thought, to my brothers and sisters on the wait staff: Been there, done that, so glad I don't have to anymore.

But it's not just my imagination that 20% isn't considered all that generous anymore. It's become standard.

"When I talk to groups of people, I ask them, 'How much do you tip, 15% or 20%?' And I'd say 90% to 95% are now tipping 20%," said Peter Post, of the Emily Post Institute. "And it's for the most basic of reasons: It's simpler."

It's easier to figure out 20% of a bill on the fly than it is 15%. You simply round up, move the decimal point one place and double the result.

If your pre-tax bill is $34.85, for example, you round up to $35, move the decimal place one notch left to get $3.50 and double that to get the tip: $7. If you get great service, you leave a little more.

While the calculations may have gotten simpler, the culture of tipping has not. I've worked in restaurants, and now I travel a fair amount, so I've seen a big shift over the years:

Guidelines used to be simple; now, gray areas abound.
Tips are handled much more sensibly in other countries, but the prospects for reform here at home are pretty dim.
The ground rules seem to change frequently, so you never seem to feel as if you've tipped the right person or the right amount.

Some guidelines

Whom, how much and when to tip Staff Appropriate tip
Waiter/waitress
15% to 20% of pre-tax bill

Bartender
$1 to $2 per round or 15% to 20% of tab

Wine steward
15% of bottle's cost (less as price rises), clearly earmarked on bill

Room service
15% to 20% of pre-tax bill (if not already included)

Valet parking
$2 to $3 when car is returned

Taxi driver
15% plus $1 to $2 per bag

Hotel doorman
$1 to $2 to hail cab; $1 to $2 per bag for help with luggage

Hotel bellhop
$1 to $2 per bag

Hotel maid
$2 per night, paid daily, clearly marked 'Housekeeping'

Skycap
$1 to $2 per bag, $2 minimum, in addition to any fee

Hairdresser
15% to 20%

Manicurist
15% to 20%

Spa services
15% to 20%

Food delivery
10% to 15% with $2 minimum

Golf caddy
$20 or 50% of the caddy fee, whichever is greater


But what if you get lousy service? Post says he caps his tip at 15%, then talks to the manager or maitre d' about the problem. "Not tipping doesn't correct bad service," Post said.

Stiffing is also a bad idea because:

The poor service you got may have been beyond the wait staff's control, such as problems in the kitchen or management's failure to have enough workers on the floor.

The federal minimum wage for tipped employees is $2.13 per hour, so wait staff depend on tips to earn a living wage.

Wait staff often must divide their tips with other workers, such as bussers, bartenders and head waiters, so stiffing a bad waitress can end up hurting innocent parties.

More from MSN Money
Talk back: Have some tipping guidelines of your own?
What's up with all those tip jars?
Just say no to the 'upsell'
10 things your restaurant won't tell you
10 things your bartender won't tell you


Like me, Post would like to see the U.S. adopt the European system of paying wait staff living wages so that tips return to their original intent: rewards for really good service.

Until then, though, we're stuck with what we've got.

(And by the way, if you don't want to tip because you consistently get poor service at restaurants, consider whether the problem might be you. I know I used to give friendly, polite folks a heck of a lot better service than grumpy, condescending or demanding ones.)


Don't stiff the skycaps

Bless these angels in blue hats: They're often the only pleasant service experience available at airports anymore.

They check you in at the curb, helping you avoid the long lines at the counter and speeding you on your way. And they used to be such a bargain: $2 a bag was considered a good tip.

These days, though, many airlines have muscled in by charging a mandatory $2 fee per bag. That's money the airline gets, not the skycap. Post recommends tacking on another $2 for the first bag and $1 for each additional bag.

Sure, that means checking a couple of bags can cost $7. If you'd rather wait at the counter for 20 minutes, before the 30-minute line through security, you still have that option.

It's OK to keep it simple
The more folks we turn to for help, the more tipping situations we face. It used to be that eating out and travel presented the bulk of opportunities to tip, but now many people have fleets of people at home and at work to consider: babysitters, housekeepers, personal trainers, dog walkers, parking lot attendants, food deliverers, etc. Keeping the rules straight can be tough.

"When tipping is confusing," Post said, "it leads people not to do what they should do."

Many regular service providers, like housekeepers, are traditionally tipped once a year at the holidays with a bonus that equals the cost of one or two visits. Others, like hairdressers, are tipped during each visit and then again at the end of the year.

Furthermore, one visit to a hairdresser can produce a multitude of opportunities to tip: There might be one person who shampoos, another who colors, a third who cuts, perhaps a fourth who does the blow-dry. If you're lucky enough to lounge away an afternoon at the spa, you may face a locker room attendant, a towel attendant, a pool attendant and one or more therapists offering services.

That's why Post recommends simplifying the process whenever possible. Just add a 15% tip to your final bill at the hairdresser or spa and ask the checkout person to make sure the tips are distributed appropriately.


Other guidelines can help reduce confusion. If a person is considered a professional, such as a teacher or an attorney, you don't tip. If the person works on your home or vehicles, there's usually no need to tip. But if a person provides you a personal service, a tip is probably customary. When in doubt, ask the service provider what his or her other customers usually tip.

About those tip jars

These proliferating little buckets don't irritate me as much as they do other people. Post is among those who chafe at seeing them pop up everywhere from coffee shops to the corner bodega.

A tip jar indicates the folks behind the counter don't rely on tips to survive, which means your contribution is entirely optional. At some places, like my local caffeine station, I'm delighted to pop in a buck for their consistently good, cheerful service. At other spots, I just ignore them.

One thing I won't do is skimp on tipping out of a false sense of economy. I feel strongly that if you can't afford to tip properly, then you need to curtail the activity that leads to the tipping. In the years when money was tight, I saved by eating out infrequently, going to cheap places to have my hair cut and taking public transportation rather than taxis. I didn't try to save by stiffing the folks who provided me with services I opted to purchase.

One last tip

Some of you will doubtless want to argue about the role of tipping in U.S. society. Feel free; such debates are one of the reasons the Your Money message board exists.

Just don't e-mail me with supposed "definitions" for the word tip.

"Tip" is not an acronym for anything; it doesn't stand for "to improve performance" or "to insure promptness." The word tip, as currently defined, was in use by the mid-18th century, long before acronyms came into widespread use during the 1930s and 1940s. (Think of the classic World War II acronym SNAFU, for "situation normal -- all 'fouled' up.")


And even if "tip" were an acronym, "to insure promptness" is the wrong use of the word "insure"; to be correct, the word used would be "ensure."

There. End of lesson. No need to send me a tip.

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So like--

It's been a wicked couple of weeks, months, year.... LOL---Oh I am gonna be so all over the place here and you guys know me once in a while I am articulate but I am making no promises here. HAHAHHAHHA-

Wahhhhh no one wants to hear the bullshit of everyday life which is cool because we all go it, you know? When we do share it(Bullshit on a platter), the cool thing is we realize we actually are not the only ones feeling controlled by the almighty fucking dollar which none of has have enough of no matter what you may be labeled by status, social class ....right?

So screw it take that frown turn it upside down.bwhahahhaa

 See, just maybe I haven't been spoon fed enough shit as learning lessons this year..

Maybe --Hell I need to lose everything I own at 46 to learn another one--hey man I don't make the rules..I just try to keep rawking and go with it. Period. I am far from EMO..I am far from suicidal... homicidal just maybe---MUwhahahhaha--

Okay hold on need a beer here-- Yes I am broke and have a beer..Saved pennies are a wonderful item you NEED to use them for something..coinstar machines best thing they ever came up with ya think?

AND YES I will eventually get to the title of this blog--EVENTUALLY--

oh yea-- Some people have rawked my world this week. Time spent on this electronic box.

an added bonus--A particular phone call from someone I really enjoy talking to (and yes this time please do think I am talking about you because I am-somehow you always get it lol--even if I am wicked close to certifiable )

But man the best thing I had to hear this week was from someone who means the world to me and I have pondered this thought quite a bit....

"okay if you can't make your rent to begin with...what's the point of the ridiculous late fees, because if you are late they already KNOW you are struggling"

So 60's -- THE MAN-LMAO

-{{LANGUAGE ALERT!!! }}

shhhh someone tell my f***ing landlord he can't take his millions nor his fucking property with him, okay??? when his ass dies..that's it man...game over.
Spend your damn life workin it. Drive that escalade-

- and guess what--REALITY check..your money you earned and squirrelled before you died, because you FORGOT to live while doing so......those you left behind will be having a FANTASTIC party at your expense because you sir, were a prick in life...

Who gets the last laugh now--- Yeee haw for contributing so much of my dollars I so hope I am invited to the keg party

hmmmmm---

There is something else here before I get to the scarin little kids stuff-- let me think a second....

TIME----don't waste it man--if ya love someone tell them, alright? Hell even a HOOK UP --sorry kiddies this for like the over 21 crowd I am not advocating teenage hormonal impulse but dam remeber how cool it was to be young? How many of you over 40's can say you hit concerts still and deal with the mosh pits and hang on the rail, huh??

LIVE!

Take a chance never be afraid to be who you are...BE true to you--

I am NOT going down with regrets --I have had so many weeks to think about certain things and you know what? The people in my life that are here.

 I am HAPPY you find ME worthy of your time, really.

It is an HONOR to be called your friend, your sistah--I am loyal I promise-I gots friends that are in situations they can't change you know? and instead of saying to  CHANGE them ..I try to listen, understand--sympathize--

oh shit I am thinking I am leaning on the word compassion here--OUCH-- I know hard word for a lot of people... but man always put yourself in someone else's place even if for a few minutes--

It is an amazing world when you slow down long enough to really listen to people..Or maybe I am just weird I tend to draw people to me--that tend to ask odd things of me... (well giggle not that odd )

Could it be October--HAHHA told ya i'd get here!!!!!

 LOVE this MONTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!---could be cooler (GRRRRR) but still...and you know what so far this month has majorly sucked except for Oct 1st.... LOL

We the freaks... those brought up on Outter limits, the Twilight zone, Carnival of Souls, Edgar allen Poe--Dark Shadows, Bella lugosi--

This is it man--

The month we wait for all year.

When I was pregnant with WEDNESDAY the bets were all on the child WOULD be born on Halloween..(she is Oct 29th, Pugsley Oct 26th)I have loved this Holiday since I was so small running around my neighborhood...

I even loved it when the nuns made us dress as our Patron saint in Catholic school----

Now as adults...ummm it makes us quite Frisky and the scary thing is .(besides of not having one single volunteer to solve this ummm craving with, le sigh).How many of you actually allow yourself to act on these impulses, hehehhehehe

You know those odd little traits and fetishes we hide all year--giggle they are allowed out..to a degree. Everyone I know into this holiday to the extreme--their sex drive is like non stop and over the top right now  as well... (damn, lol) I mean-- lol you guys all know "my gift baby" My bride of chucky child... She was conceived while setting up a torture chamber for a Halloween party--

So to keep that curtailed...... We decorate..we prop build... and we have fun. Cutesy Halloween does not work for some of us period..

All about the horror, right? or is it? All about the FEAR, hmmm maybe. All about things others may consider strange but we consider perfectly normal...

hey blindfolds and handcuffs ARE NORMAL, okay right? huh? What? LOL!

oh back to the story--whoooa train derailment into thought land----Last year I worked the Haunted Hayride with the high school drama club.

Now I am the biggest chicken in the world..I swear to you--I can scare myself. Made up monsters love me I am totally engrossed in the scene like at Halloween Horror nights ect;-- Guys love me as I cling like crazy LOL!-- don't scream just GRAB

Last year for the first time I was on the FLIP side--I was getting to do the scaring...THAT was sooo much fun! We just Rob Zombied the trail and oh it was awesome... The city of Tavares cancelled our event this year.

I just found out this afternoon though----------

.My family--THE ADDAM's FAMILY was cordially invited work a different haunted Hayride on the 27th of October..out on a ton of land... This made my day--

I get to go scare the hell out people...

Now, I do this on a regular basis, but in costume it is so much better in the woods, in the dark....Oh man there I go again-- What the heck, eh?

So now I have one October problem solved... I am still hopein the ummm other October problem gets a little satisfaction (SOON!!!! Please!) in a freaky way a little Spontaneity ...muwhahahhahaha---

Come up to the lab.... and we see what's on the Slab..or we can use it, yea, uh huh--- hehehehehhe

See you in your NightMare's kiddies-- or Pleasant Screams..

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Can you hear me? Can you hear me running? Can you hear me, can you hear me calling you?--

over and over and over in my head--for days!

Well the good thing is I am not certifiable and I do know WHY...lol

The hard thing is someone is not listening as usual Actually there is not much that can be done....

You ever sit down and look at your life...Lay it out like a set of architect plans for a NEW house, OKAY? and just look at how many things are interconnected.

Now I am not dissing you guys that believe in "coincidence" but I will tell you I am NOT one of them nor will I ever be...TOO muchhas happened this year.

It looks as though nothing has been accomplished really..you know same old routine but I know better---

Anyway-- Get to me before it's too late..I feel it...

There is that energy...... Aye storms on the distance. But all I keep hearing...

Can you hear me? can you hear me Running? Can you hear me Running can you hear me calling you?

I will love you forever and I can handle whatever hurricane is on the horizon trust me--and this time I MEAN Trust ME-----it is freakin imperative!

oh yeah you guys--actually everything is fine, lol!

i didn't want you all to think I am homicidal or Suicidal--hehehehehhe...Head is just deep into thought...

Keep it brutal.... have an AWESOME MONDAY!!!!

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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a goood mourning!

Man I have been writing (ok rambling) way too much lately!

this place is pretty cool...Should be Lost Souls network :)

Hmmmm So like it's the weekend. ....

Anyone hate weekends? LOL! Yea well sometimes. I feel trapped so weekends I stay busy as possible even if that means grazing MAULmart for hours...ewwwwwww

So let's see-- G is busy with work. MY 2 really tight friends have their own ??? to deal with... MY friend P is about as PISSED at me as it gets *le sigh*

I can't HAVE what I want... sucks but true. Don't tell me there is hope on this one. NO negative attitude, just total truth. 

You know-- man, I am cool with this. Acceptance is the name of the game. 

 Hell screw the ROLLING STONES--because, "I can't even get WHAT I NEED-- "

So then whatta you do?-- I am a child of the 70's. We take a vacation from our heads....

I dunno been a long week..Sweet and Sour.

Most of you know I waitress for a living. Cool Little Italian place. If I didn't have my job that actually believe it or not I really do love, I may not have my sanity (or do I?)

But it's all good I put my feet on the floor daily-- do whatcha gotta do for the Spawn you brought into the world right...

My problem is I am ALWAYS ummm out spoken I guess...say what's on my mind at the time.

Sometimes it gets misconstrued for B-I-T-C-H....

Kinda cool how kids can make you homicidal and suicidal. Damn man I thought I had accomplished it all as a teen..MY teens keep throwing new stuff at me..Always amazing keeping me young.

Home..well we don't discuss much. There are a few that get it. WHY I am here..But even I am working on that. sloooowwwwwwllllyyyyy--Ya just don't turn around and run making everyone homeless on a Server Salary, LMAO--

I am missing certain people in my life today---

What I do  when I have had it out with someone big time-(Over something that wasn't even about them personally, sigh)-and you did sit down and write,you swore you'd wait for them to answer back..but they MEAN that much ta ya and it is eating ya up because they HAVEN'T written back?

Rationally I say let it go, their loss..if they don't miss my company, my conversation, as much as I do theirs ..well then nothin I can do, right?

Okay so that is WHAT I keep telling myself anyway---

It's just not working that well....the convincing. hehehhehehe

So then like I concentrate on other stuff-- Like my 6yr old. Playin here at the site, meeting and yakking (which is something I obviously do well) ;) And my time is interrupted by someone around here ALWAYS wanting from me, Something.

Blah, blah, blah--Scream, Magic--Help me out here? LOL!

Anyway Saturday morning at 7am, hmmmmm I am thinking I should probably just go handle the damn the situation driving me insane. Just go SHOW my remorse in the way I know how---which is never a bad thing.

Wonder what the day will bring-- Looks like rain...yummmmm

More rain,love the rain.---

and if all else fails there is Xanax and beer...hey,  I work in a restuarant I can get anything you could ever want or need, muwhahahahaha---

Thinkin about things I am looking forward to.

Week of Thanksgiving.

 I am going to that damn show (Yes I am Gail, wanna go???) HE already said just me and the kids..HE doesn't like the bands... oh HELL YEAH I am looking at ALL my time on the RAIL up front--rawking BIG TIME! I love SEETHER!!!!! you love Breaking BEnjamin--and NOW I have more insentive..the GUARD dog is staying home, wooohhhhhhhooooooooooooo

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whatta ya wanna do with your life? I WANNA ROCK!
Current mood: mischievous

 goood mourning!!!!!!!!!!

I gots no email to answer--and for some reason deep realm is not allowing comments...soooooooooo, hehehehheheh-

I was off wednesday and thursday..It was cool but man one of these days I am going to get the damn house to myself... Wednesday it rained a lovely, dark dreary day--well coulda been--but I ENJOYED the weather

Yesterday was cool Lisa and I took off went to breakfast. I did the house stuff..Then had quite an interesting afternoon.. Even if it was online..hey I'll take it...I was THERE.

What's with you guys you all keep asking me about the TRAPT song on my playlist--**giggle*** listen, my pretties--to the lyrics it's all about the MUSIC always.

Speaking of ---I am thinking heavy on the Nove 18th --JRR b que--line up is----Breaking Benjamin, Seether, Sum 41, Nonpoint, Drowning Pool, Finger 11,Skindred, Operater, Fiction Plane

never heard of the last 2 *shrug*

Time for a RAIL show I gots so much frustration from this year it's right where I belong,LOL!--only thing that would make it better is if they add KORN and DISTURBED--

Trying to get G to go, hahahhaha----

On a musical side note-- I hate to say it but my daughter Wednesday has me just loving MCR or for those of oyu not familiar My Chemical Romance--check the song "teenagers" out it is a hoot!!!!

There's a few my age you'll catch up on the rail but not many. **shrug** where I always spent my time you know? I even meet a few at work that are my age and we discuss the days of the Hollywood Sportatorium--which was located in the everglades in of course Hollywood Florida

You young kids, got it good..you ain't lived til you tried to survive a show at the sporthole--I always swore it was so far out in the middle of nowhere in case it ever blew up no one would notice---Early Rail days..and sigh trampling as well, hehehehehhe---

No moshing though or crowd surfing..I have to admit with the shows these days most of the men are awesome about protecting women on the rail from Surfers and Moshers. Last 2 Edbd's I went to were great.. I had no problems..

Ask me again HOW I get up to the rail at these shows Jrr puts on--hehehe a cake walk compared to the old days..Even my teens hang with me because they KNOW that is where I am going to be....

What is it about music, huh?

I have this thing going on this week...I pissed someone off unintentionally (really..I am serious here, because I know you all know I am the ICE QUEEN) so I tunred to my Cd's

Funny thing is (don't you guys dare laugh at me) there are 2 bands in particular I always wind up turning inward to. CREED and--- well not a band, but Melissa Etheridge (first album only)

The first time I ever even heard Stapp (moron ego boy that he became) I was walking thru a room and just stopped stood there frozen. ..I would go on later to tell M Tremonti-- that it is all about FEELING the music. I think The Creed show I went to..which was one of the last actually..was one of the most POWERFUL shows I have ever been to. No I am not talking from a religous aspect... listen to "Torn", "Who's got my back", "Weathered" Faceless Man--this is some of the most powerful stuff written--in my opinion.....

The other BEST band I have seen in concert in all my years--is Nickelback--old school rock and roll soooo much energy up front (of course we are ALWAYS on the rail,LOL!) and the band is very easy on the eyes for us Ladies...

 Hell Kroeger starts with Animals (as the rock world does know, the man is the muffin man) you melt...forget figured you out-- it's an automatic--please... drool fest and quite willing to be on your knees--hahhahahha

Ahhh new school..old school It's still ROCK..and the energy at a show on the rail can't be had anywhere else in the world....

So here we sit--it's friday.. end of the work week for some. What kinda week did you have?

I am milling over some stuff in my head. It was sour, it was sweet..it's always confusing. I keep telling myself to just settle down and let the dust settle...maybe they'll be back maybe they won't...maybe, maybe, maybe--

Live, LIVE, LIVE-- I am starting to come around. I am alive and waking up from a coma here. --pfft yes, I am leaving the trapt song  I'll post the lyrics--

Where are we winding up??? hell if I know--maybe I'll find it in a song...

Yea I am hoping I can undo some unintentional damage because i'll be damned I am always gettin myself in trouble, aren't I? and I am looking to have some fun--even if it is sitting right here as I "created my own Prison"--

I guess my biggest thing Is somewhere inside there is ALWAYS hope-- Maybe that what keeps me going--I dunno--

I could just be certifiabley stupid as at like 46-- that hope, hahhahah should be ICE with the rest of me, right???? LMAO!

I'd love a wicked spontanious move{oops I thought that in picures did I? hehehehe }today, tomorow, SOON! There has got to be someone in my life that sees things the way I do--

Just maybe ONE person?

The out of the blue--let's do this..and I look up like a DEER in HEADLIGHTS and go--awesome! let's go!!!!!!!

Every single song on my myspace and the REALM has meaning-(ggeeezz get over the backgorund on my Realm page--I am a product of my environment--lmao see you teens only thought you could get away with that, not so!!!hahahahha!!!!)- every single Song---

oh look up the Trapt lyrics... LOL!

Have an awesome day everyone and be HAPPY you are alive..pray those you love find their way back and cherish the one's around ya!

ROCK ON!!!!!

Currently listening :
Away From The Sun
By 3 Doors Down
Release date: 12 November, 2002

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